Since I have met Harrison, I have fallen in love with many of his friends and family. I feel like they are mine now, just as much as they are his and sometimes maybe even a little more ;) God opened the floodgates of blessings when He put Harrison in my life. There is one woman in particular who has been extra special to me as she was a big help as I battled lymphoma.
I discovered how special Ginger Jacumin was to Harrison's family when we went to attend her wedding back when he and I were dating. You are a special person indeed if my mother in law gets dressed up to go anywhere for you! I heard nice things about her and her soon to be husband along with hilarious stories of Harrison and his brother growing up with Mrs. Ginger's son.
Down here, most families set a week aside during the summer to stay at the beach. That summer, her family was there the same week as Harrison's. It was also shortly after she had received her second diagnosis of breast cancer.
Harrison and I met up with them and were able to catch up her new husband on the beach. "Mr. John y'all sure have been traveling a lot!" Harrison joked. "She's dying, Harrison. It's gotten to her bone. So we go where she wants to go." I was grieved as I listened to him explained her situation. It gave me a not so fun perspective as I was learning for myself how deep and serious my feelings were for Harrison. It was something that I just couldn't imagine. Little did I know that I had cancer at that very moment and God would soon have us go through the same thing, at the same point in our marriage! But certainly not to that extent.
As she walked up to us, she tipped her hat revealing the little hair she had left due to her treatments, and with a big smile she said, "how do you do!" Incredible. I had no idea she was a cancer survivor and you certainly wouldn't know that she was up against this battle for the second time. I remember I told her once, "I don't know what I would do if someone told me I had to get back in that chair again." She responded, "Oh you would do just fine. I've kept up with your blogs!"
Mrs. Ginger found out she was doing well enough to switch to a chemo pill during the same time as my diagnosis. The pill has a lot less side effects, plus you don't have to go sit in the chair for 5 hours at a time to receive your treatments! It always gives you something to look forward to when someone you know has a check up or a scan scheduled the same day as your treatment. She and I got to visit each other from each end of the spectrum. She and her husband came to visit us during my first chemo after I shaved my head. She looked beautiful! You could tell those pills were doing her a lot better than "the chair" as I call it. Her face was lit up and she had a thick head of silver hair that had its natural flow coming back. "Don't worry. Once it gets to here, it just grows and grows!" She told me.
The next time we were able to visit like that, it was the other way around. I saw an update from her saying she was going back in for weekly chemo treatments. I have learned that I'm a delayed griever. At this time, I had just entered a new stage where I had become very empathetic towards other cancer patients. I don't even know what you would call that, but it certainly helped me work through my experience with the disease. So when I found out that a beautiful, strong, and kind person like her had to go back to the chair, I lost it. I spent more than a few minutes sobbing on my couch for this women. Yes it sounds dramatic, but remember I was grieving!
This all happened to be on the same day as my scan so I was definitely going to see her. I sent her a message letting her know I would be up there and asked if there was anything in particular was craving or wanted to eat. If you have read this blog from the beginning, you know that I definitely had my own cravings! She turned down the offer, but I got in my car and left early anyways. My first stop was the Lifeway to find something to help keep her mind on what's important. I spent too much time searching for the perfect book. It couldn't be depressing, had to offer hope that Jesus gives no matter what you're going through in life, and it had to have questions/exercises for application. I finally found what I was looking for and walked over to Panera Bread to get her a sweet treat. I guess this is how I grieve!
It's never a quiet moment with Mrs. Ginger. There's always something to talk about and the conversation is always fulfilling and entertaining! We got to catch up and laugh as I downed that awful drink I needed before my scan, and then she told me what I was not expecting to hear. She had received so many good reports, I figured she was getting better. When I asked her about it, she responded, "Oh honey, I'll never be in remission. They're just keeping it at bay." I couldn't help myself. Treats began to flood my eyes and I was about to loose it. She quickly changed the subject, leaving me totally embarrassed! I'm so thankful now that I had that visit with her. "Something sweet, and something to pass the time." I explained as I handed her the gifts.
A few days later during a late night conversation on messenger I deeply apologized. "I am so sorry I started crying! You should not have to be the one comforting me while you're the one in the chair!" Little did she know, I was sobbing at that very moment while I was processing all of her latest health updates she had given me. My hero's response, "Oh don't cry for me, I'm a child of God!"
I'm so thankful for all of the love I have opened my heart for with the wonderful people that came into my life with Harrison. I'm particularly thankful for this radiant "child of God." I only hope that her suffering was as minimal as she led it on to be. My heart is broken now though. Mrs. Ginger's good reports dwindled fast and her body could no longer take the treatments. I sobbed some more last night as I wrote this and now Harrison and I are grievous as we have just heard the news. Mrs. Ginger, in all of her radiance, has gone to be with Jesus. It was such a painful prayer for me last night as I asked God to please take her home soon. She has fought this disease for a long time and, in my eyes, deserved nothing more than the peace and happiness of being in heaven with Him. I was not ready for her to leave us, but I was more than ready for her to finally be pain free.
I would ask that you would please pray for those who are learning what life will be like without her beautiful soul. Her husband, who was faithfully by her side through this gruesome battle. Might I add, with a smile on his face every time that we saw him. Pray also for her two children and six grandchildren. This is a sad night for our community. Mrs. Ginger touched so many lives and through this post, I hope one person's experience of her unwavering faith was able to touch yours too!
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